LGBTIQ+ asmenų skyrybos Nyderlanduose: tėvystė, turtas ir procedūra

An LGBTIQ+ divorce in the Netherlands follows exactly the same law as any other divorce: the same ground, the same procedure and the same rules on property, maintenance, pensions and children. The main difference lies in the facts: if your family was formed through a known donor, adoption or surrogacy, often partly abroad, it may be unclear who is the legal parent, and that must be settled before the petition is filed.

Which rules apply to an LGBTIQ+ divorce?

The same rules as for every marriage. Under Article 1:151 of the Dutch Civil Code (BW), the court grants a divorce if the marriage has irretrievably broken down (duurzaam ontwricht), whatever the gender or sexual orientation of the spouses.

A divorce petition is filed with the district court by a lawyer. If you agree on all consequences, you file a joint petition; if not, one spouse files a unilateral petition and the court decides the disputed points. Under Article 10:56 BW a Dutch court applies Dutch law to the question whether the marriage can be dissolved, unless spouses with a common foreign nationality choose that law under the conditions of that article.

Is ending a registered partnership different?

Yes. Under Article 1:80c BW registered partners can end their partnership by mutual consent through a declaration signed by both partners and a lawyer or notary, registered by the civil registrar, without going to court. Since 1 January 2023 this route is closed if the partners have joint children over whom they hold custody; they must then go to court. Read more about registruotos partnerystės nutraukimas.

Who is the legal parent of your children?

That depends on how parenthood was established at birth. Only a legal parent automatically has rights on custody, contact, information and decisions, and a duty to pay child maintenance.

Two mothers

Under Article 1:198(1)(b) BW the wife or registered partner of the birth mother is a legal parent by operation of law, but only if they were married or registered partners at the time of birth, the child was conceived through artificial insemination with a donor whose identity is unknown to the birth mother, and a statement confirming this was submitted when the birth was registered. In other cases, for example with a known donor, the second mother only became a parent through pripažinimas arba įvaikinimas.

If neither step was taken, the divorce can reveal that only the birth mother is a legal parent. The other mother then has no automatic right to custody and needs to ask the court for contact or joint custody.

Two fathers

Dutch law has no route by which a second father becomes a legal parent automatically. Parenthood then usually rests on vaiko pripažinimas. by one father and adoption by the other, often after a surrogacy arrangement abroad.

Each step must be checked: was the acknowledgement valid, was the adoption completed, and does a foreign birth certificate or court decision have effect in the Netherlands? Dutch law has no statutory surrogacy scheme as of October 2026, so the general rules on acknowledgement and adoption apply.

What if you raised a child without being the legal parent?

Your role in daily life does not give you the formal position of a parent. You can ask the court for contact (omgang) if you have a close personal relationship with the child, but custody, choice of school and medical decisions remain with the legal parent or parents. Have this assessed before the divorce petition is filed.

What must be in the parenting plan?

If you have joint minor children, Article 815(2) of the Code of Civil Procedure (Rv) requires a parenting plan (ouderschapsplan) signed by both spouses in the divorce petition. It must at least cover the division of care, how you inform and consult each other on important matters, and the costs of care and upbringing (Article 815(3) Rv).

In LGBTIQ+ families, a known donor, a surrogate or another adult may also play a role in the child’s life. They have no legal position as such, but you can record practical arrangements about their contact in the auklėjimo planas for the child’s stability.

Which court and which law apply in an international case?

Within the EU, jurisdiction for divorce is set by Regulation (EU) 2019/1111 (Brussels II-ter), as Article 4 Rv confirms; it usually depends on where you or your spouse habitually reside. The law on your matrimonial property is governed by Regulation (EU) 2016/1103.

Not every country recognises a marriage between partners of the same sex. That matters if one of you has another nationality, owns assets abroad or married in another country. A Dutch divorce may then not be recognised abroad in the same way, with consequences for property, inheritance or pension rights there.

Children make this more pressing. A foreign birth certificate, foreign adoption or surrogacy abroad may have effect in one country and not in another. If one parent is considering a move abroad with the children, check the legal parenthood in both countries before any step is taken.

How are assets, the home and maintenance dealt with?

By the same rules as in any other divorce. Which regime applies depends on your wedding date and any prenuptial agreement; pension rights built up during the marriage are equalised under the Pension Rights Equalisation (Divorce) Act (Wet verevening pensioenrechten bij scheiding), unless you agree otherwise.

The facts can still give rise to specific discussions. Think of unequally shared costs of fertility treatment or international family formation, contributions to the household that were never recorded, foreign bank accounts and gifts. Collect the documents early: bank statements, invoices and any agreements between you.

Child maintenance follows legal parenthood, with one important exception. Under Article 1:394 BW, if the child has only a mother as legal parent, her partner who consented to the act that led to conception must pay child maintenance as if they were a parent, even without legal parenthood. A partner who did not consent and is not a legal parent has no such duty. Read more on our skyrybų advokatas puslapį.

Ką reikėtų patikrinti prieš pateikiant paraišką?

Most problems are avoided by answering the parentage and international questions first. Check the following points in this order:

• Who is the legal parent of each child, and on what basis: by law under Article 1:198 BW, recognition, acknowledgement or adoption?
• Who holds custody, and is it joint custody?
• Are there foreign birth certificates, adoption orders or surrogacy decisions, and do they have effect in the Netherlands?
• Which matrimonial property regime applies, and is there a prenuptial agreement?
• Which assets, debts and pension rights exist in the Netherlands and abroad?
• Must the divorce be recognised in another country where you or your spouse live or own property?

What can we do for you with an LGBTIQ+ divorce?

Mūsų šeimos teisininkai work in Dutch and English on divorces with parentage and international questions.

• We establish who is the legal parent of each child, based on the birth certificates and any recognition, acknowledgement or adoption.
• We check whether foreign birth certificates, adoptions or surrogacy decisions have effect in the Netherlands.
• We draft the parenting plan, including arrangements with a donor or other involved adult where useful.
• We draw up the overview of assets, debts and pension rights for the division.
• We file the joint or unilateral divorce petition with the district court.
• We request a contact arrangement for a partner who is not a legal parent.

Santrauka

• An LGBTIQ+ divorce follows the same rules as any divorce: irretrievable breakdown (Article 1:151 BW), the same court and the same financial rules.
• The key question is who is legally a parent; for two mothers this depends on Article 1:198 BW, for two fathers on acknowledgement and adoption.
• A partner who is not a legal parent can ask for contact but has no automatic custody.
• Foreign marriages, birth certificates and surrogacy arrangements are not always recognised in every country.
• Clarify parentage and international aspects before the petition is filed.

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